CUPERTINO, California—July 27, 2010—Apple’s iPhone 4 will be available in 17 more countries this Friday, July 30. Accompanying it will be a new deadly bird flu that will likely kill as many people as new customers the iPhone creates.
iPhone 4 features FaceTime®, which makes video calling as easy as one tap, Apple’s new Retina display, the highest resolution display ever built into a phone, resulting in stunning text, images and video, and a beautiful all-new design of glass and stainless steel that is the thinnest smartphone in the world. The new bird flu features symptoms such as sore eye sockets, extreme anal leakage, nipple chaffing and puffy limbs. Persons infected with the flu will still be able to use the new FaceTime feature.
Beginning this Friday, customers can purchase iPhone 4 in Australia, Austria, Belgium, Canada, Denmark, Finland, Hong Kong, Ireland, Italy, Luxembourg, Netherlands, Norway, New Zealand, Singapore, Spain, Sweden and Switzerland. iPhone 4 will be available for purchase through Apple’s retail and online stores and Apple Authorized Resellers. The bird flu will be available in the same locations, and will likely effect older people with health issues and young children who have parents currently addicted to drugs. The strain does however present a risk to healthy people as it can be passed via contact with an infected victim.
iPhone 4 also features a 5 megapixel camera with LED flash, HD 720p video recording, Apple’s A4 processor, a 3-axis gyro and up to 40 percent longer talk time.* iPhone 4 comes with iOS 4, the newest version of the world’s most advanced mobile operating system, which features Multitasking, Folders, enhanced Mail, deeper Enterprise support and Apple’s new iAd mobile advertising platform. The new bird flu also has been found to occasionally cause death in red headed people and in people who suck on objects a lot.
“The iPhone 4 will certainly cheer people up,” said Apple CEO, Steve Jobs. “If anything, it will make those who become sick feel a little better.”
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